The night after the baby shower my sister threw, my dad called me and invited me over. I had gone out to dinner with my sister and cousins and decided to go to my dad's after dinner. It was a little strange because my husband called me to make sure I was going to my dads, then my brother called, and then my dad called again. It was actually kind of exciting because we all thought that he might have bought something for me or the baby.
When I went over there, my dad had news for me that I was not prepared for. Although, when I stepped in the house I knew that something was wrong. First, I noticed blankets on the floor that had never been there before. Especially at this time of year. Then my dad said that I could use his restroom, which doesn't sound weird to any of you but we generally use the spare bathroom not my dads. Anyway, when I came out of the restroom I realized that Princess, my dog, had not come inside to say hi. I asked my dad where she was and he told me that is what he called me over for.
It turns out that Princess was very sick. She hadn't eaten anything since Thursday and when my dad came home on Friday, she couldn't stand up on her own but could walk if you stood her up. Then when my dad came home from the baseball game on Saturday, she couldn't even walk or hold herself up and she had started vomiting that night. My dad had to carry her outside to go to even go to the the bathroom because she wouldn't allow herself to go inside the house, she would whimper a little to let my dad know she was ready. Naturally, when my dad told my I just cried. My dad gave Princess to me on my 20th birthday when she was only 3 months old. He rescued her from the pound. She stayed with my dad after I got married because Teddy's condo doesn't have a yard and I didn't think it was fair to take a dog that had spent the last 8 years of her life being able to go in and out of the house as she pleases to a place where she is cooped up for 8 hours.
Finally I had to go outside to see her. Which was so hard because the only way you could tell she was excited to see me was she wagged her tail a few times. I sat down next to her and rubbed her head and she just laid her head on my leg and looked up at me. My dad and I stayed outside for about an hour and then we took inside. My dad and I decided that I would come over on Sunday with Teddy to help her get in and out of the house to go the bathroom and then I would take her to the vet on Monday to see what was wrong with her. When my dad picked her up to bring her inside I noticed that she had soiled herself, which isn't like her because Princess wasn't one to go to the bathroom when there were people around, which wasn't a good sign.
Needless to say, I didn't sleep at all that night. I would just wake-up in tears. My dad was going to leave his house to go to work around 9 that Sunday morning. He said that he would take Princess outside and put her under the tree so that she could use the restroom but be in the shade until Teddy and I got there. Since I couldn't sleep, I got up to go in to work to finish up a few things. Plus, if I was going to be missing work on Monday to take her to the vet I needed to get some additional work done. But when I got to the office I didn't realize that I needed a code to get into the building. So I turned around to get Teddy and head over to my dad's house.
Since Princess hadn't eaten since Thursday, I thought maybe it was the hard food that was keeping her from eating. So Teddy and I stopped at Petco to get some diapers (to make it more comfortable for Princess to stay inside and still go the bathroom) and some soft food. When we got my dads we went outside and I noticed that Princess had her head in the water bowl. It was submerged, but when I got to her her snout was sopping wet and I had a hard time lifting her head to get it out of the bowl. What I think happened is she put her head in the bowl to get a drink and then she couldn't get it back out again. I was so happy that we got there when we did because I don't know how I would have been able to handle what I could have found.
At that point I realized that she was so much worse than the night before and that I needed to take her to the hospital. I called my dad and he told me that she went to the bathroom all night on the blanket in the house and that she vomited all night and he also recommended that we take her to the hospital.
The moments leading up to finding a hospital that would take Princess, when we heard the diagnosis, and the decisions that were made are a blur so I am sorry if they go a little faster than the paragraphs above. Basically, Princess went into a diabetic crisis. Her blood sugar was over 500 when it should have been between 90 and 120. The hospital vet told us that it was genetic and only a matter of time before it affected her. Then it was time for decisions. This was the hardest part, Teddy was there supporting me, but he made a good point when he said that he couldn't make any suggestions because Princess wasn't his dog. He loved her, but she wasn't his. She was mine and this decision was left for me. I called my dad and talked to him. Then I called my sister. I even broke down a little with the nurse at the hospital explaining to her that I was going to have a baby in a month and I didn't know what I was suppose to do. The nurse was very nice and as helpful as she could be in that situation and made me feel a little better.
As you can probably tell, I had to make the decision to put Princess down. It was by far one of the hardest decisions I have ever made in my entire life. Luckily Alyssa and her boyfriend Andy came down to the hospital to say their goodbyes and give their support. I can honestly tell you that it affected me more than I thought because I actually became physically ill and had to leave the room for a little while. But I actually had to grow up and not think about my feelings for once. I had to think of Princess, the value of life, my husband and our little baby.
Even though I know Princess is in a better place, not a day goes by that I don't think of her and wish that I could see her again. But that is what life is all about, growing up and making decisions that you hope to God are the right ones.
