Incidents 260-268

I hope everyone enjoyed my sister's guest entry. The night began lovely, just as Alyssa described it; however, there were a few things she left out that lead up to Incident 268. It is my duty to address them one by one. Please start with Incident #260 further down to learn the story from the beginning.

Also note, Incidents 260-269 all happened between 6:30 p.m. and 7:30 p.m.

Incident 269

After Alyssa and I composed ourselves, we headed up to see our niece. The day before, the nurse showed me where Shawn and Mindi would be staying for recovery. So when we got to the floor we went straight to the room. I stopped real quick to get cupcakes I had bought for said niece's birthday.

When I met Alyssa at the door she knocked and no one answered.

She knocked again…no answer.

Knocked again and added "housekeeping, want me fluff your pillow?"…no answer.

Then I opened the door to look in and the room was empty. Apparently, they had changed rooms and didn't tell us. When we headed back down the hall to the Nurses station, we saw our dad standing there. Apparently he had been there the whole time and we never saw each other….

Incident 268 Rebuttal

The only thing that I am going to rebut regarding my sisters outline of Incident 268 is that after I smashed the bag in her face I was really concerned that I had hurt her. She kept mumbling something about her lip and I couldn't understand her, so I thought I had cut her lip, pushed to hard, or that something was seriously wrong with her. I like how she left that part out of the story. I only smashed the bag in her face as a joke and I didn't even really mean for it to make contact…

The funniest part about the bag incident is that the spot of liquid was so small. We really had to search the bag to find it…

Incident 267

After we finished eating, I drove us back to the hospital and accidently went in a turn lane that I believe was just for U-Turns. Apparently that was all Alyssa needed to start telling me how to drive and find a parking spot at the hospital. Can you see why Incident 268 happened?

Incident 266

This next part I don't quite understand, but while we were sitting there eating Alyssa turned on my overheard lights in the car. When I turned them off, she replied that she likes to have the light on when she eats. The reason I don't understand that is because her house is really dark, even with the lights on. So I didn't know why she would need to the light on in the car. Needless to say she lost.

Incident 265

After we ordered, I drove to the JITB parking lot for us to eat. Alyssa didn't understand why we didn't just drive over to the hospital parking lot and that is when I told her that she was now on her second strike. The third strike she was going to walk home.

Incident 264

After QT Alyssa and I headed over to JITB so we could get some food. Now Alyssa hadn't been to this JITB before, but I had gone the night before to get my dad and brother some food so I knew how to get to the drive-thru. So as I turn into the parking lot Alyssa gets so upset that I didn't make the first turn and went a long way which actually gave me a better turning radius. What happened while we were ordering is unclear, but I can tell you that Alyssa placed her order and I was not given a chance. So I had to order when we got to the window.

Incident 263

After I went to the bathroom I didn't see Alyssa in the store, so I thought she went back to the car. Which was odd because I had the keys. When I got to the car I saw that the headlights were on but no one was in the car and I thought Alyssa was trying to play a trick on me. I get in the car start it and sit there. A few minutes go by and no Alyssa. I start to panic because her purse is in the car and it was unlocked with the headlights on….initially I thought she had been kidnapped. I started to look around the whole parking lot. And to be honest, I really was scared. But then I thought, just go look inside one more time before you say anything to anybody. Good thing I did, because when I walked back up to the door and saw she was paying for the items. I was really relieved to learn she hadn't been kidnapped.

Incident 262

During that whole ordeal, I had to go potty really bad. (I am sorry I said potty, but I felt that if I said I had to go to the bathroom really bad you would have thought something else.) When we get to QT we get out and are welcomed in the store. I go straight to the bathroom and Alyssa went to get Mindi's request…tootsie rolls. Well, when I went to the restroom there was a sign on the door that said "Closed for Cleaning" and a mop bucket outside the door. So I turned around and went to help Alyssa where we learned that neither of us pay attention to each other and we had two different conversations at the same time. Here is what was said:

Alyssa - Why didn't you get Shawn's soda

Stacey - Because some guy was cleaning it.

Then Alyssa ventured over to the soda and saw that no one was cleaning the soda machines and I headed back to the bathroom as I saw someone coming out which meant it was good to go.

Incident 261

Once the fitting was over, we ventured out to the hospital. It just so happened that it was around dinner time. That is always a touchy subject as my sister and I have a hard time agreeing on what things to eat. Anyway, as we get closer Alyssa calls my brother to see if he and Mind need anything and we get their request. As you read, he wanted something from QT but we hadn't decided on what we wanted to do. I suggested that we get a snack from QT and then stop for something with more substance on the way home. Well Alyssa did not like that at all and wasn't shy about expressing it. After I asked her a million times if she wanted me to stop at JITB with only being told no, I headed straight for QT.

Incident 260

My annoyance began before we were even in the same vehicle. That night my bridesmaids' had their first dress fitting. Alyssa and I had decided that we would meet at the bowling alley on Rural and I-60 to carpool to the bridal shop and then the hospital. Well, of course leaving work at 5 o'clock can have its hiccups. I can't remember what time I suppose to meet her, but I was late. She called and we "discussed" our options and then decided to meet at the bridal store and then carpool to the hospital. I arrived only minutes after everyone else, so it worked out great.

Guest Incident #268

Hi everyone this is Stacey’s sister Alyssa, aka poohead/aka abroblogstalker. I have the unique opportunity to be a guest blogger on Stacey’s blog!

I wanted to write about incident #268 in which I was the victim of one of Stacey’s incidents.

It was a lovely Thursday night, a great night really because my niece had been born the day before. Stacey and I were heading to the hospital to visit said niece and we ended up making a few pit stops on the way to kill time (baby niece was practicing eating and she needed her privacy!) We stopped at QT to get our brother a soda and there was an incident with Stacey and the bathroom (I’ll let her tell that one) and there was an incident with Stacey getting to the car earlier than me (again, I’ll leave that one to her) but the one I want to focus on is the incident that took place with the Jack-in-the-Box bag from dinner.

To set the stage, we were both very tired. We clearly had sympathy fatigue for the new parents-waiting for text messages at odd hours of the night and for babies to be born is very hard work! We were both a little irritable (mostly Stacey) and short-tempered (again Stacey)…

Ok, so we arrive at the hospital. We’re in the car gathering our things to take up with us. We grab our purses and drinks. The bag from Jack is in the center of the console so I push it towards Stacey for her to grab.

We laugh.

She pushes it back at me.

We laugh.

I threw it at her.

We’re laughing harder.

And then she chose to RAM IT IN MY FACE.

After the brutal attack I realize there is something on my lip…all I know is it feels wet. I start screaming (while laughing my butt off) that I have something on my lip. “What’s on my lip??” “What’s on my lip??” But I’m trying not to move my mouth because I don’t know what is there so it sounds more like “wup on ma lip?” I’m imagining the worst that maybe my lip was cut from the bag or something gross is on there!! Finally after we compose ourselves (sort of) from laughing Stacey looks and says “IT IS JUST WATER”. Somehow the bottom of the bag got wet (maybe condensation from a drink?)

This started our laughing again and we kept laughing until our tummies hurt and we had tears running down our faces. I don’t know which is funnier, her ramming it in my face or me thinking I had a busted lip from it.

Thanks, Stacey, for letting me blog!

Peace out!

Headbands

After reading the comments on my "Famous" blog, I realized that I forgot to tell a very funny and embarrassing story that happened at the Mary Kay party. If you haven't been to a MK party before, you usually sit around a table at what would be a "station" to try out the different product. Generally, you wash your face with their product and then follow with their make-up. It is actually pretty fun if you haven't every tried it before. Anyway...the consultant gives you headbands to hold your hair back while you are testing the product....well at the end of the night, I asked her if I could keep my headband. She responded with "No, I take them home and wash them so I can reuse them." Well she said this with a smile on her face, so I thought she was joking. But she wasn't. Everyone started laughing and telling the MK lady to hurry and get the headband before I steel it and they are super cheep at Walmart.

I looked and sounded like a psycho...but she was smiling!!! How as I suppose to know she was serious?????

Word Verficiation

Have any of you noticed the word verifications that we need to type in every time we post a comment? Just recently I started paying attention to them and I feel like blogspot is trying to be funny...For instance, I just posted a comment and my verification was "gnoosh" which I think is funny when you say it.

So from now on when I leave a comment for someone I am also going to include my word verification...

Famous

Last night I attended a MaryKay party at my friend Kim Moore's home. Many of you know her as the candle lady :) There were a few PartyLite consultants there along with Kim's sister. One of the Consultants, Elaine, brought her daughter Alicia. (sorry if I spelled her name wrong). I didn't talk to Alicia that much, but I could tell that she is a fun and very nice person. She also seems to have a really good relationship with her mom which I kind of admire...anyway, I digress (I have always wanted to say since I saw Kathy Griffith's stand-up show)...and I digress again!!!!

While we were putting on our make-up Alicia asks me if I was in the video, which I didn't understand what she was talking about. Elaine said that she recognized me from the "You Dirty Rat" entry on my blog. I was so excited!!!!!!!!!!! I have been recognized from my blog, and by somebody that isn't related to me!!!!!!! Everyone said that is their favorite entry and they love my blog!!!!!!!!!

I liked Alicia before this comment, but now I feel we can be the best of friends!!!!! I don't know if Alicia will want to be best of friends, but I would like to hang out with her....Good thing Roni and David bought me those Superstar Sunglasses for my birthday. I will need them when the paparazzi start following me!!!!

You Dirty Rat

A few months ago (I know I am behind) I did what I do everyday, walk up the little walkway to our front door. I usually take a look in my dad's garden, just out of habit, but when I looked this day I was greeted by something other than flowers.....

Meet our little friend...the mouse. Okay, I know the title said "You Dirty Rat" but it didn't sound quite right with "You Dirty Mouse". Anyway, I have no idea how I spotted this little guy. Here is a picture of my dad's garden, and this little mouse was hidden in the far back corner balled up against the wall....

When I went inside, I told my dad that we had a little mouse and he didn't believe me. So he went out there to make sure I was telling the truth. Well, of course this was the kind of event that would need documentation. So I ran inside and got the camera and came back out. Dad couldn't believe that I could see the little guy...but he was big, and I couldn't believe that Dad couldn't even see him....here are few more pictures.:

Okay, I really hope that PETA doesn't read my blog because my dad threw little pebbles at the mouse to get him out of the corner. Then he took a hose and sprayed the bushes to make sure that he out of the yard. But after thinking about it, the poor little mouse was probably hiding from all the cats that love to lay in Dad's yard....poor little guy.

The footage that you will see is hilarious...it is very rare that I can actually do something without a bad result. Hence the point of my blog. So, I now introduce to you all Incident No. 252....the first part of it was cut off a little bit...But let me set the scenario for you....after Dad is done hosing down the yard we go to the front door to go inside. When I turn the handle for the screen the handle wouldn't turn...I turn around and look at Dad and he just stared at me and said "No F*&^n' Way!! You locked the door?" In my defense, there was so much excitement with the mouse that I must have locked the screen door on my way out....it wasn't my fault! I had to get outside in time to get pictures for my blog!!! I did inform my Dad about that and his response was full of words not suitable for my blog....

Anyway, to get inside Dad had to climb the fence and go through a window...I will tell you what window in case anyone tries to break in...I placed the camera on the garbage can so that you will be able to see everything. P.S. the part of the video where I throw my arms down is when I get yelled at again and I tell him it isn't my fault....

Oh yeah....the part where I run away I went across the street to borrow a pair of flip-flops to use when he jumped off the fence. There are a lot of rocks back there. Then when I am not paying attention, what a surprise, my dad throws a flip-flop and almost hits me in the head!!!!

Elevators

This morning I got stuck in the elevator at work :( I got in just like any other morning, pressed the button for the third floor and when I got there, the doors started to open and then stopped. They opened just enough for you to put your fingers in between the doors.

I stood there for a moment to sort of assess the situation and to make sure I didn't panic. I pressed the door open button and nothing happened. I was about to call my work to tell them I was stuck and would be late, when I saw some men on the other side of the door trying to open it. The only problem was, there was so much noise we couldn't hear each other. I am not sure why it was so loud, but it was.

When they couldn't get the door open, I just started hitting all the buttons. I figured I would make every effort to get out on my own before I had to pick-up the red phone and make a call. I am not even sure who is on the other line? Firemen? Dang...maybe I should have called...j/k Teddy.

Anyway, after all the buttons were pushed the two men were able to push the door open. Funny thing is, they weren't even elevator repair men. They were there picking up someones recycle bin....

The funny thing is...this lasted all but 5 minutes. I sure felt like forever being trapped in an elevator. Well, this is how my day began....I wonder what else will happen.

Radishes

Eating radishes again today...boy are they spicy!!! Sorry Teddy, no kisses tonight.

Blisters

My cousin Lindsay and I started our first day of walking. We used to do this a few years ago, but stopped. And boy do I show it. Anyway, in an effort to get in a little more shape before my big day (10/24/09 for those of you who might have forgot) we started walking.

As I detailed in one my earlier posts, my dad got me a pair of MBT walking shoes. They are really good, and boy can I feel the burn when I wear them but I need different sock. I have the worst blisters on my heels and on my big toe!!! Have you ever heard of such a thing...anyway, I have another pair of socks that I am going to try tomorrow.

Hello My Nemesis

As many of you know, I have an issue with choking. I have decided that choking has become my nemesis. Dictionary.com defines nemesis as the following:

nem⋅e⋅sis  /ˈnɛməsɪs/ Show Spelled Pronunciation [nem-uh-sis] Show IPA
Use nemesis in a Sentence
–noun, plural -ses  /-ˌsiz/ Show Spelled Pronunciation [-seez] Show IPA . 1. something that a person cannot conquer, achieve, etc.: The performance test proved to be my nemesis.
2. an opponent or rival whom a person cannot best or overcome.
3. (initial capital letter) Classical Mythology. the goddess of divine retribution.
4. an agent or act of retribution or punishment.

I believe that each of those definitions describes my relationship with choking. Even though many of you are laughing or scratching your heads wondering how I can have a "relationship" with choking, it is real and it can happen to anyone.

For the past few years, I have had to make sure that I don't have anything edible (i.e. food or medication) in my mouth when I'm: walking, running, laughing, or talking. To be honest, I can't do anything other than sit there or there is a chance I will choke.

People always wonder why it takes me so long to eat, well I realized that I don't touch my food while I am talking because I will choke. I would rather be the last one eating so that I can have a conversation with someone without the anxiety of another "incident".

Which leads to me to the point of this entry, tonight, while telling my dad how the funeral went I had to take some vitamins. They are the size of horse pills and I have to cut them in half. I almost had a close call while trying to take them whole and I was by myself the other day, but I was able to cough it up and spit it out. While my dad is taking to me, I try to hurry up and take one of the halves, so I can respond to my dad. I should have taken my rushing as a sign, but before I knew it...disaster struck.

I started to gag, and I told my dad I was choking. He responded with "your fine, just breath and swallow." I was able to talk and swallow, but then it really did get stuck. I started to grab my neck and run towards my dad. He got behind me and tried give me the Heimlich. Mind you, he had to get in a big sigh of annoyance before doing so. He got behind my and gave a little squeeze. I was still gagging, started to cry and my face started to turn red. Before my dad could really do anything, the pill started to move down. Then I was fine. We both stood in the kitchen in silence just to make sure I was ok...

Alyssa always tells me I need to relax when I feel like I am choking, and if I wasn't sick I don't feel it would have been an issue. But I promise, this time it really did get stuck. Ask my brother, he really had to give me the Heimlich after I choked on a chicken finger after I got my braces on, so I do know what it feels like to really choke. That time I let it go so long my face started to turn colors.

I cut the remaining half of the pill in half, meaning I have to now cut them in fourths to make sure this "incident no. 200" doesn't happen again. :( Oh, to be a fly on the wall...but at least vegetables don't come out of my nose when I eat them...